With a crimson sunset engulfing the ocean behind us, Elka leads us through the Agni Hotra Mantra. In unison, we repeat Sanskrit text meant to honor the relationship between the Father Sun and the Mother Earth. As the circle repeats the words, I find myself catching a rhythm between words and breath harmonizing with the group. As words effortlessly leave my mouth, I find myself wondering what the heck is going on in my life. Not more than six months ago, I would have pointed and laughed at this type of activity, but today I find it fulfilling. As if an unseen energy flows through me, every round of texts feeds some part of my soul. Is this caveman evolving? Do I have to start eating tofu and wearing Patchouli oil?
As the sun finds its way behind the skyline, Elka slowly silences the group to explain what happens next. “Now dat our mines are clear, we can move to meditation.” Asking everyone to lay on their backs and find a comfortable position, we close our eyes as Julie’s bowls start to sing. Soon Elka’s voice becomes distant and I can feel my consciousness slip as my body relaxes into the ground.
Jerking suddenly back to reality, I hear instructions from Elka. Where the heck did I just go? With a vague memory of a black abyss, a start following her instructions. Breath to this area in your body, move this body part, keep breathing while imagining this and that. Yes, I’m being vague for a reason. Much like your hands rubbing together vigorously, heat and motion take over areas of my body. Like small engines withing my spirit, I can slowly feel energetic revolutions gaining speed. Moving from my pelvis upwards, I imagine myself shoveling breathe into my body like a locomotive operator preparing for hill. Faster and faster my body gains energy as life fills every corpuscle of my being. Like a rush from a roller coaster floating down a lazy river, I feel connected to something pure. I can see flashes of light, feel currents of energy and imagine myself cleansing an unseen part of my being.
Slowly, the bowls fade and Elka voice guides us back to reality. “Moving eslowly, remember where ju are. Move jor hands…feet… stretch jor new body and come back to your mat.” It’s over already, that was like 15 minutes. Moving my body, I feel lighter and somehow tired. Coming to a seated position, I feel strangely tired with a gassy feeling within my heart Chakra. Did I just say heart chakra with a strait face? Looking around the circle, the group looks exhausted. Like the Monday after a Vegas bachelor party, everyone’s face looked as if they experienced something they couldn’t explain if they wanted to. My body felt exposed and sensitive and all I craved was chocolate and a chick flick. I wanted to burst out in tears of joy. I wanted to write every friend I had to invite them to the next event. I wanted to call my parents to tell them I loved them and call anyone I needed, to say sorry for what ever I thought I did wrong to them. But first, I just wanted to sleep.
Waking up the next day, I was still drained. I called Elka to make sure I was ok and she said, “Of course Shivadrian. When ju dive deep into jor spirit and let go, ju experience a different type of freedom. Dis takes effor from jor body and das why jor so tire. Take it easy, and allow jor body to recharge.” Taking her advise, I sat on the couch the next day watching Forest Gump as waves of emotion ran down my face. Cave man no cry sniff sniff, cave man must have allergies. Like removing dust and cobwebs during spring cleaning, my spirit was energized and my body felt squeaky clean. Moving slowly though out the day, I called my Dad to say I love him, my Mom to say she was special and my brothers and sisters to go have tofu later. But they weren’t into it, so we went to In and Out… because I’d rather be near my family than eat…what ever tofu is any day.
This experience emboldens me believe there is so much more to our bodies, our minds and this life than we are led to believe. Moving forward I’m compelled to rethink my beliefs, drop my ego and develop the person I’m just starting to meet.
Namaste for real